Do you feel like no matter how hard you work, results don’t come? Do you struggle to be happy with where you are at, and self-loathing is your motivator? Or do you simply not like yourself? I can relate. I used to struggle with this too.
I felt like I did not make enough progress in the previous two years with anything. I scoff at my numerous achievements, thinking I barely did anything. What I have been having to do is step back and look at the bigger picture. Nearly a full two years ago, January 22nd to be exact, I was underweight and had a tumultuous lifestyle. I was a mess that everyone avoided or sugar-coated. I made the decision to turn my life around because I grew tired of how I was. I woke up that day, then made the decision to change my life. Nowadays things are a lot different for me.
Even if I don’t fully acknowledge it like others do, I have improved. I am myself 2.0. I have gained about 35 lbs of muscle in the past year and have put on enough fat to where my period has come back. I do not engage in self-destructive behaviors and am rather optimistic in terms of myself. But why do I still feel it is not enough?
Self-acceptance is allowing yourself to be content with how you are at. It’s not being whiny about your perceived inadequacies. In the grand scheme of things, your insecurities don’t really matter. Nothing really matters if you are nihilistic, actually. As long as you hyperfocus on your insecurities, you’re going to be driving yourself insane.
I don’t buy into telling yourself that you are a “goddess” or a “warrior.” Rather, being content with yourself is one more problem you don’t have. It is acknowledging that you are doing your best. You may have a little longer and a bit farther to go, but you are fine with where you are at. Another way to look at it is that you have started on the path you have before you, and day by day you will get a little farther. Change always comes, but you shouldn’t be miserable with where you are at.
I recommend writing a list of everything you have done this past year. No matter how little it is, just write it. Consider it the opposite of an everyday to-do list. Instead of writing out what you have to do, write down things you have already done. At least, this is what worked for me.
Also being grateful with where you are at makes a difference. Keeping a gratitude log works rather well for doing this. For each day of the month, write down one thing you are grateful for.
Self-acceptance is a journey. It does not mean being totally in love with yourself like some of the Tumblrinas out there. It is being content with your own place in the world. It’s acknowledging how far you come, and how great you can be in the future.